FADE IN

On a white veil with a diamond tiara.

FEMALE VOICE (off-camera):
     I just don't know...I'm just--not sure if it screams "perfect," you know?

The camera pulls back to show a middle-aged woman kneeling amongst a mass of white fabrics--a dressmaker.

DRESSMAKER (exasperated):
     I'd be worried if the dress started screaming anything, dear.

The camera slides upwards from the frustrated face of the shop owner to reveal Anticlea, standing in front of a mirror with a frown marring her face. The wedding dress she is wearing is quite elegant and fits her stunningly.

ANTICLEA (biting her lip nervously):
     Maybe if you just took it in a little...here...and here...what about this?

The shop owner examines the parts of the dress Anticlea is referring to, but it is impossible to see any flaw in either the dress or the fabric.

DRESSMAKER:
     If I make any more alterations, you might want to just start over with another dress.

ANTICLEA (near tears):
     Another dress? I can't possibly...there's no time! I just so want it to be (sniffle) perfect.

CUT TO

The dark room we saw before. The woman tosses a bottle into a cauldron from which a green light emanates.

WOMAN:
     Bad, bad, bad, bad.

The camera pans in on her wide-eyed face as she leans over the cauldron.

CUT TO

The room where Anticlea is trying on her dress.

Anticlea sniffles. The dressmaker rushes to hand Anticlea a spare piece of cloth before she can blow her nose on the dress. Oblivious to the near disaster, Anticlea sniffles into the cloth for a moment, before turning back to the mirror.

ANTICLEA (suddenly perks up):
     What about this line? Do you think the neckline is too low? Do you think--

DRESSMAKER (puts a comforting hand on her shoulder):
     Darling. The dress is perfect. Just like I'm sure the wedding will be perfect.

CUT TO

The dark room.

WOMAN:
     Doomed. All doomed. Bad, bad, bad. The wedding will fail!

A door is flung open with a loud bang, flooding light into the room, which we can now see is decorated with mythological creature wallpaper and a comfortable bed, all littered with potion bottles.

MAN'S VOICE (off-camera):
     Are you hiding in here with the curtains drawn again? It's time to get ready for the wedding preparations.

The camera is still focused on the woman above the cauldron, who is still shaking slightly, with a faraway look in her eyes.

WOMAN (getting even more dramatic, obviously irritated about being interrupted):
     Doomed. It's all DOOMED!!

MAN'S VOICE (obviously not paying any attention):
     Yes, yes. Come on now. It's time.

The woman snorts indignantly and moves off-camera.

CUT TO

The room where Anticlea is trying on her gown.

ANTICLEA (obviously continuing an ongoing conversation):
     You don't think the train is too long? I don't know--

XENA (off-camera):
     The dress is perfect.

Anticlea whips around and sees Xena and Gabrielle. Her face lights up with joy.

ANTICLEA:
     Xena, Gabrielle! I thought you'd never get here!

GABRIELLE:
     We, um, took a shortcut-- (glances at Xena) and then we needed a good bath.

Xena shoots her a displeased look.

ANTICLEA:
     It's so good to see you!

XENA (smiles, overcoming her obvious irritation at being reminded of her mistake):
     It's good to see you. You look great.

ANTICLEA (eagerly):
     Yeah?

GABRIELLE (looks her over admiringly):
     You do. You look... (smiles a bit wistfully) you definitely look like--someone who's about to get married.

XENA (chuckles):
     No kidding.

ANTICLEA:
     Do you really like this dress? You don't think it's--it's-- (makes a vague gesture with her hands indicating the dress) I mean (hopeful) --does it really look good on me?

Xena and Gabrielle exchange an amused look.

XENA:
     It's not like you to worry about how a dress looks on you.

ANTICLEA (almost wailing):
     But this is my wedding! My special day! (looks herself over) I still think the bodice is just too--too--

DRESSMAKER (impatient but indulgent):
     Too what, darling?

ANTICLEA (obviously lost for words):
     Too, too-- (gestures frantically) I don't know!

XENA (aside, to Gabrielle):
     If I ever decide to get married, just kill me.

Gabrielle gives her an amused look but her smile fades and becomes wistful, and Xena looks guilty for a moment.

XENA (obviously looking to change the subject):
     Where's Autolycus?

ANTICLEA (distracted by an imagined piece of lint):
     Who?

XENA:
     You know--Autolycus? Your father?

ANTICLEA (turns before the mirror trying to see how she looks from behind):
     Oh. I think he's in the gardens. Say, do you think--

CUT TO

The palace gardens. Vines of roses climb up one side of the palace and there is a fountain in the garden, surrounded by bushes blossoming with pink and white roses. There is the sound of multiple voices chattering off camera.

Pan around to show Autolycus, with two middle-aged men and three middle-aged women circled around him. The two men look regal and refined, standing up straight and looking down at Autolycus with an air of snobbery. Two of the women look the same way; the third is a gray-haired woman who has a shawl wrapped tightly around her shoulders and looks into the distance, her face turned away from the camera.

SNOBBY WOMAN #1:
     So, have our dear children decided on a honeymoon location yet?

SNOBBY WOMAN #2:
     Yes, that is the most important part of a marriage.

SNOBBY WOMAN #1:
     I sure hope your little Anticlea can give us a grandchild soon--I've never had a grandchild before.

AUTOLYCUS (not sure what to say):
     Well, uh, you know how you can't push these things.

SNOBBY MAN #1 (slightly threatening):
     Anticlea had better be the one for our Laertes. We wouldn't want to bring the shame of a divorce down on our family.

SNOBBY MAN #2:
     The cost of that alone would send us into debt for months. (pause) Speaking of expenses, your daughter has quite fancy taste--this is what, the third dressmaker we've been through? I really hope the cost of this wedding is worth it.

Autolycus goes to answer them when he hears someone walking up behind them. He turns to see Xena, Gabrielle, and Darion walking up. Autolycus looks relieved.

GABRIELLE (smiles):
     Autolycus.

AUTOLYCUS (too enthusiastically, arms extended out):
     Xena! Gabrielle! (he walks up to them and puts his arms around Gabrielle and Xena's shoulders) It's so good to see you.

XENA (taken aback slightly by his enthusiastic welcome):
     Hello to you too. You know, I think last time you were so happy to see us, we were rescuing you from the long arm of the law.

AUTOLYCUS (in a loud whisper):
     Yeah, and this time you're rescuing me from the long arm of my future in-laws. Let me tell you--

One of the men behind Autolycus clears his throat. Autolycus spins around.

AUTOLYCUS (with a fake cheerful grin):
     Xena, Gabrielle. These are Laertes' aunts and uncles. This is King Gordus and Queen Emma from Iphis and King Lycaon and Queen Hermonia of Amgoros and their aunt, Sileni.

Xena and Gabrielle acknowledge the greeting with a little nod--snobby looking royalty is nothing new to them.

QUEEN HERMONIA (Snobby woman #2):
     Well, we must be going. There are still a lot of preparations for us to tend to and we must make sure that everything is perfect

The two men and two women begin to walk away. The older woman with the shawl stays in place, still in the same position.

AUTOLYCUS (wipes his forehead):
     Whew!

GABRIELLE:
     That bad, huh?

AUTOLYCUS (in a loud whisper):
     I feel bad for all couples everywhere who have to deal with uptight, perfectionist, bossy in-laws. I'm just thankful that when I married Penelope, she had no relatives.

Xena and Gabrielle chuckle.

The older woman begins to sway back and fourth, mumbling to herself. King Lycaon, already some distance away, stops and looks back at her.

KING LYCAON:
     Sileni, it's time to go.

He walks up to her and puts his hand around her shoulder to lead her away. She suddenly looks up and gasps.

We see that it is the woman from before, in the wallpapered room with the cauldron.

SILENI:
     Bad, bad, bad, bad. Trouble, trouble. Wedding doomed, doomed, doomed.

She begins to mumble quietly as she walks away. Xena, Gabrielle and Autolycus look after her, startled.

KING LYCAON:
     Sorry about that. That's my aunt Sileni. She's an oracle...well, she thinks she is. Nothing she has predicted has ever come true so far, so...wouldn't worry about what she says. (He meaningfully taps his finger on his forehead) I better go and make sure she doesn't get in trouble.

He walks away after Sileni.

They walk away. Xena, Gabrielle and Autolycus watch her leave.

GABRIELLE:
     An oracle, huh? (mimicking Sileni, in a dramatic sing-song) Wedding doomed, doomed, doomed. (in a normal voice, joking) Think she's on to something?

AUTOLYCUS (sighs):
     Sadly, probably not.

GABRIELLE:
     So... (smiles) ...how's Anticlea?

AUTOLYCUS:
     Very excited. (sighs) She, um--turned out to have this fussy side that I didn't know about. She's been awfully picky about her dress--

GABRIELLE (chuckles):
     We noticed.

AUTOLYCUS:
     Oh, you saw her. (shakes his head) The caterer didn't have the fish she wanted, so they had to send out for them. And the artist, for the after-wedding paintings? Anticlea practically had his whole family investigated before she chose him!

Xena and Gabrielle laugh.

XENA:
     And what about you?

AUTOLYCUS (grudgingly):
     I'm...happy for her. But...

XENA (nods, understanding):
     It's hard, letting her go.

GABRIELLE:
     Well, you know what they say--

AUTOLYCUS (disgusted):
     Oh no--not the "You're not losing a daughter, you're gaining a son" line!

Gabrielle gives him a sheepish look.

AUTOLYCUS (continues):
     If I hear that one more time, I'll-- (thinks a moment, then with forced bravado) I'll have to steal something from one of my pompous in-laws just to make myself feel better. And you wouldn't want that, would ya? So (points a finger at Gabrielle) don't say it. (He strikes a pose, hands at hips, and sighs) Well, I'd better get ready for the--big event. See you later.

Autolycus walks off toward the palace.

Xena watches him, shaking her head in amusement.

GABRIELLE:
     Come on. I think it's time to wake Darion up from his nap.

CUT TO

A beautiful lake with a waterfall flowing into the water from a high cliff above. There are large trees surrounding the lake. There is a clearing in front of the lake where chairs are set up. In front of the several rows of chairs is a garden of lush flowers and an arch covered with vines and red roses. An old man with a white beard, draped in an elegant white robe with gold trim, is standing behind the arch, a podium in front of him. He is flipping through a book that sits on the podium.

As the camera moves in, a din of voices is heard. People are walking into the clearing and seating themselves. Pan to Xena, Gabrielle, and Darion, who are taking their seats.

Gabrielle looks around, clearly awed by the beauty of the garden.

GABRIELLE (in awe):
     This place is incredible...

Darion is playing with a garland of flowers woven around the chair in front of him.

XENA (bored):
     Wasn't this thing supposed to have started already? She's probably still fussing with that dress.

GABRIELLE (trying to be positive):
     Isn't this spot beautiful?

AUTOLYCUS (off-camera):
     Nothing but the best for my girl.

Gabrielle, Xena and Darion turn to see Autolycus walking toward them. He is well dressed, wearing a white shirt with long sleeves and a red vest (just like in "King of Assassins").

XENA:
     You're certainly dressed for the occasion.

AUTOLYCUS:
     Hey, I'm the father of the bride. (winces slightly) I gotta look my best. I've got a reputation to uphold.

Laertes comes up, dressed in an elegant purple and green robe and a white shirt with gold trim. He looks happy but nervous.

LAERTES:
     Xena, Gabrielle! (to Autolycus) Uh... (nervously) Dad.

AUTOLYCUS (rolls his eyes):
     Yeah, yeah. Let me go get Anticlea, or we'll be holding this we-- (he pauses and stumbled) this ceremony under a full moon.

DISSOLVE TO

A mixture of regally dressed figures (from Laertes' side) and random people (Autolycus' friends) are seated for the wedding. There is not a spare seat to be found. Laertes is standing in front of the arch.

Music begins to play. Everyone looks down the isle to see Anticlea walk up from behind the trees Autolycus by her side, holding her arm. She is wearing the white wedding dress with a veil and a tiara and carrying a bouquet. She walks slowly toward Laertes with a smile on her face and tears in her eyes. Autolycus is clearly beginning to choke up but he makes every effort not to show it.

Anticlea stops in front of the arch, facing Laertes. Autolycus steps back. The priest looks at the two of them with a gentle smile. Anticlea and Laertes hold hands.

PRIEST (looking at the crowd):
     We are here today to unite in marriage this man, King Laertes, and this woman, Anticlea of-- (whispers to Autolycus) excuse me, where is she from?

AUTOLYCUS (whispers back loudly):
     Oh, never mind...

Pan to the crowd; the people on the groom's side start to mutter.

AUTOLYCUS (irritated):
     Okay, okay--Cyros.

PRIEST (continues):
     ...to unite in marriage this man, King Laertes of Tyrins, and this woman, Anticlea of Cyros. (looks out at the crowd) If anyone should know of a reason these two should not be joined in matrimony--

FEMALE VOICE (off camera):
     Me!

The entire crowd turns in their seats to look behind them. At the very back of the beautiful clearing stands Aphrodite.

The camera pans over the faces of Laertes, Anticlea, Autolycus and the priest as they look on in shock; then to Xena and Gabrielle, who do not look pleased.

Gasps go through the crowd.

DARION (excited):
     Aphrodite!

MAN #1:
     That's Aphrodite?

WOMAN #1:
     The Goddess of Love? Get out of here!

Aphrodite grins and strikes a pose, obviously pleased by the recognition.

XENA (grimly):
     Yeah, it's her.

Xena and Gabrielle get up and start making their way toward the aisle.

WOMAN #1:
     The Goddess of Love...objecting to a wedding?

WOMAN #2:
     The wedding must be jinxed.

Xena and Gabrielle walk up to Aphrodite as the crowd continues to murmur. Darion tags along.

GABRIELLE (bewildered):
     Aphrodite. What are you doing?

XENA (annoyed and suspicious):
     Are you trying to break them up?

APHRODITE (holds up her hands in a time-out gesture):
     Hey, calm down. It's not how it looks. (thinks and makes a face) Well, okay, it is how it looks, but it's not why you think.

XENA (cutting her off):
     Then explain.

APHRODITE:
     I'm only trying to spare Anticlea a lifetime of heartache.

XENA:
     What, because she's marrying Laertes? That's not a very good excuse.

APHRODITE:
     No, Warrior Babe. Laertes is a great guy. (smiles) And they make a really hot couple, if you ask me. But if they get married, he'll just end up hurting her.

Laertes comes down the isle toward Aphrodite with Anticlea in tow, just in time to hear the last comment.

LAERTES (furious):
     That's not true! I would never hurt her. (sincerely) I love Anticlea with all my heart--as I've never loved any woman.

Anticlea is obviously moved by his words.

WOMAN'S VOICE (off-camera):
     More than me?

Aphrodite steps aside and we see a young woman with blond hair, in a simple white dress.

LAERTES (shocked):
     Alesia?

ANTICLEA:
     You know her?

Laertes is silent for a moment. Move in closer on his face.

LAERTES:
     We were to be married.

Medium close-up on Xena, Gabrielle, and Anticlea, all in shock, as we:

FADE OUT

END OF ACT ONE