7.15 Princess of Thieves


TEASER

FADE IN

A beautiful clear blue lake is surrounded by trees and berry bushes. Close up of surface of lake. There isn't a ripple in sight until a beautiful woman rises out of the water. She has sapphire colored eyes and is surrounded by a golden glow, seeming to be one with the water.

Camera pans back to the shore and we see someone in a long robe watching her. The woman notices the figure for the first time and frowns.

WOMAN:
     What are you doing here?

ZEUS:
     Watching you, beautiful Inyx.

INYX (whispers):
     Please go away, I don't want any trouble.

ZEUS (starts walking into the water):
     The world is at my fingertips, I can control the universe, so I think "no means no" is not gong to work. (reaches her and grabs her arm pulling Inyx close) I am the King of the Gods, girl, why deny me?

In a golden flash Hera appears.

HERA:
     Because she's a smart nymph.

INYX (sobbing):
     Goddess, please save my soul.

ZEUS (sighs):
     A little melodramatic, don't you think?

The Queen of the Gods raises her hands and turns the nymph into a white dove. Inyx flies away quickly.

ZEUS (turns to Hera):
     Damn you woman! Do you have to be such a spoilsport?

HERA:
     You never learn, do you?

Hera leaves in a flash of gold. Zeus looks around for a moment before walking back towards the shore.

ZEUS:
     Well, little nymph, you wanted your soul saved. (forms a ball of energy in his hand. Inyx in bird form is circling the lake, suddenly the dove falls from the sky and Zeus is left holding a ball of bright light) A visit to Hephaestus is in order.

CUT TO

On Screen Writing: Hundreds of Years Later

Someone in a dark green cape, their face invisible, is hanging from the ceiling by a rope. The camera pans over to it and closes in on a solid golden statue of a nymph sitting on a pedestal.

It has sapphire eyes and lips made of hundreds of ruby chips; each ear is decorated with a perfect diamond for an earring. Pan back to see the entire room, gold coins sit in piles in various positions on the ground. A chest filled with precious jewels is sitting in one corner.

The figure reaches out to grab the statue and the rope breaks under the weight.

HOODED FIGURE (omph!):
     This is not good.

A dozen armed guards storm into the room and surround the intruder.

CUT TO

Sitting on a large throne is a King. The intruder is kneeling before him still surrounded by guards. Hung upon nearly every wall are posters with slogans such as "Vote for King Eurystheus. Or else."

KING EURYSTHEUS:
     Well, well, well. When Zeus died, I went to great lengths to get my hands on that statue. And here you are, trying to take it from me! Now what happens if Zeus finds out I have it? He'll take it away from me, and probably my head with it. Can you see my problem here? You somehow found out that I had the statue of Inyx. What I want to know is--how?

One of the guards rips the intruders cape away from them and we close in on the face of a scared girl. She has very dark brown eyes and long wavy, chestnut colored hair.

KING EURYSTHEUS (shocked):
     Oh my, not exactly what I was expecting. Throw her in the dungeon; Daddy dearest will soon be here to save his precious princess. (rubs hands together) Isn't that right, Anticlea?

ANTICLEA:
     You leave my father out of this!

KING EURYSTHEUS (sinister smile):
     Sorry. No can do, Princess of Thieves.

CUT TO

A busy market place, Xena and Gabrielle are making their way through hundreds of stalls.

GABRIELLE (to herself):
     I suddenly have a craving for Indian food. Some nice rice...curry...

XENA:
     Last time you had a craving for Indian food we ended up in India.

GABRIELLE:
     That was a spiritual quest.

XENA:
     Yeah, for barah kebabs with a side of dhal!

GABRIELLE:
     You should talk. Last time we went to Chin, we spent a whole afternoon looking for a tavern that served the perfect Chicken Lo Mein.

XENA (raises an eyebrow):
     Well, at least I--

The conversation is interrupted when a large group of people runs by, seemingly chasing someone. They stop for a second, look at each other, realize the person they're after isn't there and turn around and run in the other direction.

GABRIELLE:
     I wonder what that's all about.

XENA:
     That.

Xena is looking towards a figure standing on a roof watching the villagers with amusement.

XENA (flips onto the roof):
     Ayiyiyiyiy!

Autolycus

AUTOLYCUS (turning around):
     Ah! Hey I know that breast...plate. Xena?

XENA:
     My, my, we've aged well. What's your excuse?

Autolycus still looks the same as he did the last time Xena saw him give or take a few lines around his eyes.

AUTOLYCUS:
     My excuse? (his eyes widening) What about you?

XENA:
     I'm Xena.

AUTOLYCUS:
     Fair enough.

FADE OUT

END OF TEASER